The Zen of Event Photography

The ZEN of photography

The secret to being a respected event photographer has a lot to do with an ability that few of us think about when we book our first job; The ability to become one with the environment….. This is the "Zen of photography".

It's that feeling that you are so in sync with the world around you that you could sense a misquito about to burp in the other room. It sounds funny, but it’s true. A good photographer captures what’s happening around him. An awesome photographer becomes one with what’s around him, enters the middle realm of reality and grabs the shot from the inside out, essentially grabbing the soul of the moment and holding it for ransom.
Remember the last “great” photograph you took. The one that when you first saw it, it spoke to you. It told you that you alone owned that moment in time. Then, you thought it was kind of cool, so you showed it to a friend and for a moment there was silence, you sat wondering if it was really good or not. Then they said it, “That’s really good…..wow, you know that could be in a magazine. You should enter that in a contest or something….” For a moment, all was right in the world. The economy could crash again and worlds could collide, but for that moment nothing else existed, or mattered. For that moment, you realized you created something special all your own that no one else captured. In some ways, photography is a selfish, lonely existence. The irony is that we make a living providing memories for others people.
The art of photography comes in creating beautiful imagery, but does this come from shooting for the client or shooting for yourself? A respected photographer balances shooting for himself first, and then for the client. I know, this goes against all logic and everything you’ve ever heard about event photography. Of course you must shoot for the client, but don’t forget the reason they hired you: They like your work, they like you, and most of all they trust you. Yes, a successful photographer must be mentally unbalanced to the point that you become 2 people at the same time. One part of you is shooting what FEELS right to you, it’s that sweet spot, that moment when you hit the tennis racket and the ball just pops off through the air and crosses the net perfectly. The other side of you wants to cross-dress, I mean must cross over the aisle to the perpetual aisle and shoot from the head, not the hip. Being able to capture both what you desire and what the client expects, makes a good photographer. Doing both of these things at once, could very well lead to greatness.

James & PJ / NOH8

We met for our shoot at Shutters in Santa Monica on a pristine evening. The skies were clear, the sand was as soft as talc, all seemed right in the world. Except for one thing. They couldn't stay much longer to enjoy it's grace. James & PJ married in Canada the week prior, and were heading to live in London. PJ is from Poland and cannot be a citizen by marriage, as the laws don't recognize gay marriage. Jame is a United States Citizen. His mother is his champion. His sister is his rock. PJ is his love, but their family is separated by an ocean until the laws change. This is only possible through awareness. It is my hope you can see in James & PJ not a gay couple, but a couple who is very simply, in love.

The Starfish Bride

I just shot a wedding in Hawaii. I've always wanted to say that. As a matter of fact I'm saying it out loud as I'm typing,  because it feels so good. Not just because as a photographer you dream of such things, but because for me it was life full-circle. Raised in Hawaii since I was four months old, the wedding was just one sandy strip away from where I grew up gathering shells, getting pummeled by waves, and eating sand. Not on purpose of course...

As the 6'4" Brigadier General towered over his precious bride, her three children looked on. Bare feet with sand clinging to their toes from their morning jaunt in the ocean, the family gathered for an intimate ceremony on the bluffs of Bellows AFB General's estate. The attentions to detail were personal. She was his starfish. He told her a story one day when they first fell in love: There was a cranky old man walking down the beach amidst a slew of stranded starfish. Suffocating in the sand, a young woman came by and began to throw them one by one back into the sea. He looked at her and said, "My dear, why waste your time throwing them one by one back into the sea. There are far too many to save. How could you possibly think this is going to make a difference?" The young woman answered as she picked up each starfish and said, "It matters to that one", and  flung it to the ocean. "And that one...and that one...and that one..."

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Are you ready to POP?

Are you about to POP the question? Let me be of service! (And I don't mean as just your photographer ;0)

I'm here to save you from yourself...ah you are cute and all, even with that hole in your knee from bending and the tendinitis from practicing the art of opening that precious ring box you've kept hidden in your underwear drawer (because that is the one place you know us gals will never dare venture...). You've watched the Robins Brothers ads with her sitting next to you, ached with excitement that you knew something she did not..finally...

You are counting down the days, your palms sweat at the thought that this, this one moment that is all yours, is about to become a reality. The bride dreams of the wedding day, the groom dreams of the day he's paid off the ring, OH and holds his sweetheart in his arms...forever.

This Valentine's Day I'd like to be the cricket on your shoulder, and give you a little heads up, some tools to work with for once you have announced to the world you will be husband and wife. And that at least for a little while, you actually knew something that she didn't know...

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What the heck does a photographer know about planning a wedding? I mean, all we do is show up and shoot, right?
In actuality, it is the photographer who is essentially the mole of every wedding. It is the photographer who is there from beginning to end, has seen what works, and what doesn’t, and we notice when things run smoothly, or not, and why!

First of all, if you do nothing else first in planning your wedding, re-frame your mind, your thinking, your entire DNA and reboot...you are now a Bride and a Groom.

The first thing to do is plan for TWO budgets. Create a low-budget wedding, which will get you into Heaven with a fast pass. Then plan a higher-end gluttony budget, which will result in a temporary stay in Purgatory. Why two budgets? Because this will allow you to really clarify what means the most to you, and what you can do without! Think about it! When you have to sit and think about what is MOST essential to your day, your priorities are set and you have that referral base to refer to when you start to get out of hand and the local psyche ward needs to be summoned with their ceremonial bridal straight-jacket.

1.    Once you have determined what is most important to you, get those vendors set in stone EARLY. Did you know most photographers book about six months in advance?

2.    Saturday is not always the best day to get married...Consider a Friday night or on a Sunday! The most popular day to book is Saturday, so the demand is there and vendors are sometimes overbooked on those dates and locations are at their peak. Also, really think about an off-season wedding! You’d be surprised at the extra-delightful tone you would receive on the other end of the line by vendors if you approach them with a January, February or early March wedding. This is slow time for the industry and everyone has come off of the holidays. This is a great time to look for deals even from the most elite vendors ;0)

3.    Don’t be afraid to look at vendors your other vendors recommend. First of all, if they recommend someone, there’s usually a reason. The vendors I recommend, I’ve seen in action, I love not only their work, but their personalities!!!! Remember, as I said, vendors are people too, and the personalities of your vendors will help to dictate the personality and vibe of your entire day! You may have found a florist with gorgeous flowers, but what if they don’t work well with others, what if there are certain restrictions with the church or with the reception area and they get super cranky and upset the planner/coordinator and then the florist doesn’t care as much as they used to so your flowers show up an hour late and the photographer is off schedule and the portraits are late, so the mother of the bride is cranky which results in an argument which is heard by the priest…..well….you get the idea…

4.    On items that mean a lot to you both, make sure both bride and groom meet with each and every essential vendor together. I was pleasantly surprised when my manly hubby-to-be actually cared which flowers we used! You end up learning a lot about each other and realize that the decision-making you are enduring and sharing together in planning a wedding is a wonderful blueprint opportunity for how you will be making other decisions in the future. This is a time, which will be the barometer for future negotiations. Don’t be afraid of this experience, embrace it and realize that this event is a gift to yourselves as a couple embracing the rest of your lives.

5.    Remember that a big wedding is not always going to be the most memorable. Well, to rephrase….you may remember the debt….but please, from the bottom of my digitally archived heart, know that your guests really don’t mind if they don’t go home with a silver plated shot glass from Tiffany’s. (well, ok, I’ve secretly longed for such a treasure, but we’ll keep this to ourselves…)

6.    Your friends love you, THAT’s why they are there! OK, you may have some social climbers and dysfunctional family members as well, but in the end this is a party for you and your loved ones. Period end of story. Don’t forget this when planning your wedding. Select flowers which make you FEEL beautiful, which will brighten the hearts of those you love. Don’t go picking bouquets to impress. If you choose elements for your day because they feel right to you, it will all fall into place. This may seem whimsical, but I’ve seen it over and over again.

7.    Don’t be afraid to hire a wedding coordinator for Day-Of services! Many coordinators offer this service at a minimal expense in the larger scheme of things!!! It is a GIFT to yourself and your family, your mothers especially, to have that one contact person for all of the vendors, who ensures that your day will go smoothly. They do it all that day…and are your best friend so that your maid of honor and best man can do their jobs of tending only to you, not running around trying to contact the linen guy because the tables aren’t set yet!

8.    If you are getting married outside, if there is even a 10% chance of rain, MAKE SURE YOU HAVE BACK-UP TENT PROVISIONS!!!!! Make sure the site, or your planner has this locked in. I shot one of the most beautiful weddings in Malibu where it got completely rained out and the entire table settings were drenched,favors were ruined, and the entire reception had to be reset during the ceremony...

9.   Think of your wedding as your baby which is growing and festering inside. It is your belly, nobody else's, and you have the right to tell anyone not to touch it. Your wedding is your personal space, to be respected. Yes, if your parents are paying for part or all of it, it is the loving thing to do to inquire as to their suggestions, but in the end it is up to you as to how you will remember your day.

10.  Most of all, remember NO MATTER WHAT HAPPENS, LIFE IS ABOUT STORIES! Not every wedding is going to be perfect, there will probably be little things here and there which can go wrong, but at the end of the day there are only three people who need to show up: You two, the minister, and well…..let’s make it four (your photographer…;0)

My First Wedding

The very first wedding I ever shot was on a Saturday, and on Tuesday my images were on Martha Stewart. Four months later there was a full four page spread on my work in Professional Photographer Magazine and the rest should we stay is history. From then on I had somehow undeservedly become this phantom success that everyone wanted to figure out. Because of my perceived accomplishment in the photography world I suddenly seemed to know a secret that no one else could figure out. The emails flooded in from around the world, asking me how I did it, how did I make it? I didn’t understand. In my eyes I wasn’t successful yet, I was just beginning to figure this whole photography business thing out for myself.

My situation was the classic definition of success. Success is when preparation meets opportunity. In my case, it was preparation meets chutzpah meets damn good luck.

My first wedding was a referral from my oldest daughter’s 4th grade teacher. I had already been shooting portraits and headshots for years, and every year offered a free session to my children’s teachers and their families, just my way of saying thank you. Prior to my business taking off, I too was completing my credential program when I had to make a decision between teaching and photography as there was no way I could do both, and do both well, as well as be a wife and mother of four with two dogs and rotating reptiles. My first bride and groom were a dream come true in every sense of the word and are still two of our best friends to this day. She insisted on paying me, money I found difficult to accept as I had never shot a wedding before. She had faith in me from my work on my site and we moved forward on a minimal budget. Unbeknownst to me, she happened to be marrying the brother of a well-known actor on a prime time series. Although his brother looked familiar with his chiseled Hollywood good looks, I could not place his celebrity but found it comforting that placing his face eluded me. The wedding took place at the actor’s home in tony Sherman Oaks, he was best man, his wife maid of honor and their 2 little girls were flower girls. Where budget lacked, ingenuity reigned. The ceremony took place atop the hot tub covered with wooden planks and the reception held in their French colonial style backyard. The groom’s mother purchased clean lined roses in delicious pastels from the flower mart in downtown Los Angeles. Clusters of twisting pedals grouped in simple square glass containers graced the center of each table all to the tune of $250. Tealight candles nervously twitched around the flowers with a simple chocolate brown and white polka dotted ribbon. Her dress was a silken sheath, the groom beamed in a cream linen suit. Portraits were taken along a stone wall in front of their wooden fence dividing their properties, protocol was dismissed and joy abound.

I didn’t know how good I had it until this wedding put me on the virtual map of wedding photographers. I had no idea this simple, lovely, unaffected event would change my life forever. It was not any international wedding with secret service attached, nor was it a movie star which would dictate a five digit fee once my name was associated with them. This was a wedding occurring from sheer serendipity, with goodness and grass roots anchoring it solidly in reality. I did not have fancy camera gear. The entire wedding was shot solo, with a Nikon D-70, 2 batteries and an SB-800 flash, which I had no idea how to use properly. At this point I thought the head on it swiveled so I’d have something to play with if I got bored. I may not have had the best technical chops at this point for shooting weddings, but boy did I have heart. I knew just enough to work my ass off to get the shots. My heart raced in my chest from the moment I saw the flower girl staring up at her taffeta dress hanging on the closet door, to the middle of the ceremony when their youngest daughter crawled onto her grandpa’s lap and whispered in his ear. My palms sweat from the moment they kissed to the reception when the only way to get an over head shot of the reception, at night, was to crawl up on their roof. If there were ever a wedding boot camp, this was it for me, because it meant that much to me that there was no way in hell I was going to get it wrong, even if I didn’t know everything I was supposed to. I was going to figure it out and not miss a beat along the way. I was a wedding virgin, and my cherry had been popped. Just like your first time, it hurts a little, but no matter how much pain you feel, God forbid you let on that you are the least bit uncomfortable in fear of taking any joy away from the other party involved.

I left that night with blisters on my feet and a right hand that was frozen in the shape of a D-70. I barely slept that night, wired from the experience and watching late night TV as I excitedly imported each of my images (in jpeg mind you…I had no idea how to operate in Raw). In looking though my images, one by one certain images would grab my heart. It was a visceral response as to whether the image was truly special. The ones that were hit me like a burst of awe, almost an aha moment of a sudden knowing that something was completely right. Only these images did I pull together and master and emailed them over by morning to the bride and groom. It was only about 10 images from the night, but each I knew were solid, universal moments that would hopefully speak to the couple. Sunday afternoon I received a phonecall from the best-man-brother-actor. My heart stopped. I felt for sure I had done something terribly wrong, why else would he be calling me. Perhaps he was upset that I had climbed out on his roof. Did I break a shingle? For sure it was that I had snapped a twig from the tree during the ceremony so I could get a cleaner shot, or was it that I had fed their dog a piece of my leftovers and it got horribly ill and died…..My thoughts raced around my brain like greyhounds grasping for that piece of meat trying to make sense out of the purpose of his call before he could speak. Then he said, in his calm, eloquent drawl, “Micaela, I can’t tell you how much those images you captured of my family touched me. I going on Martha Stewart on Tuesday. How quickly can you send those files over to the producer in New York?” If my heart had stopped before, it was my tongue that now followed.

Anxiously recording the episode I sat in a surreal haze as I witnessed Martha Stewart congratulating him on his brother’s wedding and commenting on each of my images as they appeared full screen; how lovely the roses clung to one another in the vase, the essence of the day captured in such beauty…. From then on, things were different. My Nikon and I weren’t in Kansas anymore…..

Bensko Photography Weddings

Aspen Bliss

Mount Sopris sprung through the backdrop emitting it's grandeur upon the back lawn of the prestigious Aspen Glen. Shakira and Noah, from Miami, juggled bipolar weather forecasts of pending storms (a continuing theme in my latest May-June weddings) yet won the meteorology sweepstakes with gorgeous skies and 75 degree winds. The most precious flower girl, Mollie, (with a touch of stage fright) melted the guests. They toasted Mother Nature with bubbly and danced the night away with stars a flutter and candles humming by outdoor fireplaces. As I sat under the pristine skies, having shot my last image, I reflected upon my job and realized...life is good.

Grace at the Jefferson

The skies taunted Grace & Adam for days, constant threats of thunderstorms and tornados...yet! Mr. Jefferson stood firm, seemingly emitting a protective umbrella of defiance resulting in a perfect day of simple overcast and fleeting humidity. Here are just a few samples of our session at the Jefferson Memorial in Washington D.C., the ceremony took place on the West Lawn of the memorial that afternoon. This wedding was the perfect example of a couple who got it right, enjoying every aspect of their day, and chalking up any possible hiccups as simply another anecdote of their wedding day to share with their future children. Pure joy, pure love, pure bliss...it was MY blessing to know them, to cheer them on, and to shoot them...;0)

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The Tree of Wife

Sometimes a wedding is about the guests, sometimes it's about the flowers....this time, it was about a tree. A large oak cradled the couple in its belly. Fingered shadows tapping their skin. As the ceremony blossomed from this tree, so did our post-wedding session in a secret, hidden area of Los Angeles I shall only reveal upon death and scripture...ok, it's near the beach...ok, it's a state park, but that's all I'm sayin'...
Enjoy the magic of Jason & Anya. My rock and roll bride and groom, who are currently sipping from coconuts and learning how to say Humnnukunukuapua'a under a different type of tree...
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