"I am a wife and mother of four who went from a photographer running the race, to rolling my world in a chair, which has given me a lot of time to think."
That was before my stem cell transplant on June 28th, 2017, and the journey which has taken place cracking open the world of Veterans suffering from chronic pain, why they suffer now before than ever before, and how I came to this place of awareness in the first place.
UPDATE: It has been several years since I have updated this blog, and am just now returning to reengage as life has evolved tenfold during this period of time. Although my condition has been increasingly, solitary, and forever throwing us curveballs, the one constant is the meaning of life such a life challenge has revealed, which is to appreciate the little things, love all things, and to revel in the lessons birthed by tragedy. - Fall 2024
Fried Nerves and Jam started out as an exercise in survival, and therapeutic release during my 11 months of bed confinement after an accident in my driveway that led, after years of surgeries, to my being in a wheelchair, over 20 spine surgeries and procedures, an intrathecal pain pump, cervical and lumbar spinal stimulators, and fighting for my life through the world of traditional western medicine.
To muddy these waters, there is a tale to tell of hope (I used to hate that word, such a cliche), discovery, and the reframing of tragedy in unparalleled proportions and on a journey I would not change for all the Lion's Mane in the world.
11 months in bed gives you a lot of time to think - not just about life, but about those random memories that float through the mind but life is so busy we are not able to take time to reflect on how each of them truly impacted our life. In each blog entry, I attempt to wrangle these memories and dissect them, unraveling the meaning behind each one, and how it taught a lesson I was never able to learn, until now.
BIO: In May of 2013, Bensko's blog 'Open Letter to the Entertainment Industry' requesting humanity in entertainment business practices against Lionsgate Studios received national attention. She is completing her memoir, Fried Nerves And Other White Meat and has just published her first children's book The Soldier And The Squirrel. As a photographer, Bensko was featured as a leader in her field by Professional Photographer Magazine. Her photography has been displayed at The Ronald Reagan Presidential Library and has been the subject of an Emmy Award winning FOX News segment. Bensko is also Vice-President of Rebuilding America's Warriors, providing free reconstructive surgery to troops returning from war. Bensko is married to Hollywood Producer Don Bensko. They have four children and live in Los Angeles, California.
And that is where my story begins.
With an extensive lineage of Veterans back to the Civil War, the impetus for supporting our returning Service men and women is quite literally, in her blood. However, it wasn’t until Bensko began her position as VP of her family’s Foundation, Rebuilding America’s Warriors (RAW) in 2006 - Pro Bono Reconstructive Surgery for Troops Returning from War - that Bensko developed an empathy for our Veterans’ battles here at home.
Empathy is one thing, understanding is another.
The tables turned swiftly in 2011 when Bensko suffered an accident resulting in a wheelchair, over 20 spine surgeries & procedures, and six years 80% bed-bound due to the diagnosis of two of the most devastating chronic pain diseases known to our medical community today - Arachnoiditis complicated by CRPS of the spine.
A stem cell transplant in 2017, donated by family friend, changed her life forever. Realizing the magnitude of the affect OrthoBiologics can have and the inaccessibility of this science for Veterans, in 2018 the concept for Veterans In Pain V.I.P. was born. An IRS Certified 501(c)3 Nonprofit facilitating OrthoBiologic & Alternative solutions for Veterans by connecting volunteer physicians with our country’s heroes, nationwide.
In 2024, Bensko had to step back from Veterans In Pain to focus on her personal health, with V.I.P. having facilitated Regenerative solutions for over 600 United States Veterans, worth approximately $1,000,000 via its all volunteer V.I.P. Physician Network. V.I.P. Continues to focus on long-term legislative change through the lead of Alaska's former member of the House of Representatives, Sharon Jackson and team.
Origin Video
• GuideStar Platinum-Rated Nonprofit
• Certified-Resource of Wounded Warrior Project
• Endorsed by the Interventional OrthoBiologic Foundation IOF & American Academy/Assoc of Orthopedic Medicine AAOM
Physicians and Veterans may apply at www.VeteransInPain.org 🇺🇸
Experience
2010 – Honoring the Wounds of War Photo Introspective featured as The Ronald Reagan Presidential Library’s Veterans Day Featured Exhibit Photo Introspective
2009 - Present - Member of the Los Angeles Recruiting Battalion’s Grass Roots Auxiliary Committee
2007-2018- VP Rebuilding America's Warriors|A 501©(3) nonprofit offering free reconstructive surgery to troops returning from war. RAW has provided over hundreds of procedures with 460 dedicated physicians in all 50 states.
2015 – Author Of The Soldier and the Squirrel | A childrens book & Veteran speakers’ program, ‘The Soldier and the Squirrel’, introducing our youth to the wounded warrior and the Purple Heart.
2012-2017 - Consulting Producer | Consultant on award-winning documentary, The Weight of Honor, an introspectively the hidden heroes of war, the caregivers.
2016 - Present | Member of the Santa Clarita, California Veteran Collaborative
2018 –President/Founder of Veterans In Pain (V.I.P.) |IRS Approved 501(c)(3) nonprofit Providing Pro Bono Stem Cell Solutions to Veterans suffering from Chronic Pain due to service-connected injuries.
1997-2011 – Owner | Bensko Photography - Film Stills, International Destination Wedding, Editorial and Portrait Photography
Who Is This Lady, Really...
"I like pizza with soft crust. My egg yolks fully cooked. Sea salt from a dish scattered from the brush of my fingertips. Lobster reminds me of my grandfather who taught me the art of eating it whole, its eyes teetering from the snapping of its claws. Dipping the meat in melted butter then dragging it through the salt on my plate.
Sometimes I stand barefoot in the grass and regret I wear shoes at all. My favorite day is seventy-four with a Santa Ana wind. A house without dimmers makes me sad. Showers are my think tank. The toilet is my bunker. No one can expect anything from me in the toilet. I love when my dog kisses my feet or his tongue swipes my nose. The smell of someone else's fireplace gives me hope. The silence of a neighbor's house makes me wonder. I care if the checker at Ralph's thinks I'm nice. I try to return the cart in case someone's watching. I listen to people's conversations in line and wish I could say something. I wonder if my hairdresser is really happy. If my children's friends think I try too hard.
I worry if I'm parenting properly. I believe love is based on respect and without respect there cannot be love. The proudest moment of my life was completing my degree as a single mother of two. I think everything we endure we chose to happen before we were born. I believe fame is fleeting. Feeling is forever. Relationships are the key to purpose and meaning is only found in following your truth. I think people talk about others so they don't have to look at themselves. I believe mirrors lie. I believe we are not supposed to see ourselves as others do, otherwise we wouldn't be us. I think we have many soulmates and not just one. Like many teachers so we learn different lessons. I think marriage is made by hands with hope for the future of our world.
I think government is where hope goes to die as it is wrapped in a silken web of hypocrisy.
I wonder why war is an option. Why a young person cannot vote but can take a life for a country he is just getting to know. I wonder what patriotism means today.
When an old person walks slowly past, I wish I could see a picture of when they were young. My junk drawer gives me comfort. I can never find a pen. Or scissors. Or tape. But my children can. I cut my own hair when I was five. I first learned adults can lie when I was four. A crashing wave makes the Earth seem legit. The beach seduces me into retreat. I think adults are kids who've been around a long time. I think everything will be valuable someday. My idea of organization is putting things in bags. I'm obsessed with butts. Women with liposuction make me jealous. Perfection to me is fascinating and then boring. I like my dogs to sit on the sofa.
I admire people with manners. When children call me Mrs.
My husband is my best friend. I wonder why he loves me. If one of my children died I would consider suicide. But I would stop. Because my other children were alive. If my husband passed I would never remarry. Because I loved the best there will ever be.
I see myself aging. It makes me scared. But it makes me relieved. Because now it gets real. Men do not stare but will care what I say. Women won't judge and might admire my age. When I feel strongly about something I will express it, but time has taught me to listen more than to speak.
I am a Seahawks freak.
I wish to be cremated. My ashes spread over my grandparents' farm.
I believe in God. A power greater than anything our world could ever understand. So I don't try to understand. I just believe. I believe God is in me. In my children. My husband. In my neighbor's quiet house. It is in the boy who broke my heart and the man who stole it and made it whole. I believe one day it will all make sense. So for now the only thing I can do is be me. I am broken but aren't we all? We connect because we have missing pieces that others fill. Life is a puzzle. When it's complete we will see what it is. From above.
I know there is more to life but for now it is enough. Because grasping for it too soon will be fruitless. I believe in stopping. In letting life happen as it should. In showing up.
I will live until my time has come and embrace the end as the final chapter in the most wonderful book I've ever read. Like a child not wanting it to end, but too desperate to know the ending to stop.
This is what I think. Who I am. To anyone who cared enough to read this. I wish you the same. To stand in the beauty of our unfinished self and in the awe of a world that is not our own. I hope you embrace your journey with observation and reflection. And to believe that all you are is already enough. Even if you are perfectly broken. Like me." Micaela Bensko